Day 23,747: Deciding To RSVP

As I’m getting older I’m either getting really bad at playing politics, missing cues, or just getting too old for it all. I’m just not sure yet, which it is.

Tonight is a low-key gala work event. Should I go? Should I not? I didn’t really have a ticket, but a ticket is available.  Did I miss the cue to get a ticket? One of my political colleagues wouldn’t miss it for the world, and kept it close to the vest that he was going. He’d be thrilled if I stayed away.

It’s a food fest and I don’t need the calories, but should I care enough to hob nob with the hob nobbers? Should I be the bigger dog and not care if someone else’s nose gets out of joint if my face shows up?

The Feminist in me feels I should go to let the Boy’s Club, who is going in spades, know that the women should and can be represented. The Crone in me is tired of the boys games. But if you’re getting to old to care about the game, are you too old for the game? Is that when you know it’s time to hang it up? Is that when basketball players quit the game?

Ironically in checking my personal calendar, I realized last night’s post was on creating your own invitation. Check it out here.  Ironically, the subtitle is Creating My Own Invitation. That is almost a cosmic sign to go. But then again, I did create my own invitation. I can go. The question is should I? Just because I got an invitation doesn’t mean I have to RSVP in the positive. More importantly, because “shoulds” should not come into the equation, do I want to go?

The alternative is to go to the gym. My bag is packed and in the car. Let’s face it, the gym is the healthier option. The food fest will not have healthy food. The gym will let me dispel stress. The food fest may just create more.

Now, if you’re reading this, the choice likely seems clear to you. My husband counsels that there is no wrong decision here, which may be why I have trouble making the decision. Nothing is clear cut. Writing this helps me see that the healthy choice is obvious and why should I ever care about politics over personal health? And yet …

I could just show my face and leave.  I could not show my face and not care. I could show my face just to piss off the guy who would prefer my face didn’t exist in his working universe. I could swallow my pride and go to the gym. I could swallow too fattening food and go to the event and really stay and participate.

And here’s the bigger question: Why am I even debating this? This has been the price of being a woman in the workforce for ages — getting a seat at a table where you don’t really like the company.

Showing up is important in many things. It’s important to show up at home. It’s important to show up for yourself. Is it really important to show up at events that are pseudo-networking events?

Clearly, despite Cronedom, I still have more questions than answers. I guess that’s what it means to still be alive and kicking.  I think I’ll go to the gym and kick my butt.


Daily Focus on Gun Sanity: According to the Miami Herald, the NRA’s Political Victory Fund, broke a 15-year fundraising record raising $2.4 billion in March, the month after Parkland. The funds will be used to support pro-NRA candidates in upcoming elections. Each time there’s a mass shooting, the NRA goes silent and into successful fund-raising mode. The truth is mass shootings are good for their association business. Just like grassroots resistance movements, the majority of donations came from smallish donors — less than $200 per donation. You can get dismayed, or you can respond in perhaps the only equal way — making a political donation in kind to a candidate is clearly anti-NRA.